Monday, December 22, 2008


I spent the day with my daughter. Every time I'm with her she brings me so much joy. I can't imagine my life without her. I can't imagine what my life would have been had she not been a part of it. I've had some of the most amazing life experiences because of her. We've shared moments of absolute ecstasy and moments of total agony together. There isn't anything I wouldn't do for her and I'm sure she for me. We can spend hours together talking about anything and everything and never tire of each other's company. It's the mother/daughter connection that either works or doesn't. When it works it's heaven; when it doesn't it's pure hell. My mother and I had one of those heaven sent relationships. She was in my life for 32 years and that wasn't nearly long enough.

It's the little things that remind me of my mother and make me miss her. Sitting with my daughter today wrapping presents reminded me of the last Christmas we spent together and even though we knew the end was near we enjoyed every last milisecond together. She's a part of me and she's a part of my daughter. And when I look at my daughter and she smiles that HUGE smile she so often does I remember my mother, always smiling.

There's a Streisand Christmas song that pretty much says it all:

The best gift
That I ever got
Didn't really weigh a lot
It didn't have a ribbon 'round
And it sometimes made the terrible sound
The best of all it seems to me
It wasn't neath the Christmas tree
And yet, I guess I'd have to say
That it made all the other presents twice as gay
The best gift that I've ever known
I'd always wanted most to own
Yet in my dreams of sugar and spice
I never thought it could be so nice
The best gift that I ever get
Was sometimes dry and sometimes wet
Was usually pink but oftentimes red
As it lay so innocently in its bed
The best gift of the year to me
The one I hold most dear to me
A gift that simply drove me wild
Was a tiny new born child...

Enough said,
Walden Fan

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